Is Perfectionism Ruining Your Health?
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By: Erin Power
If you’re wondering if you’re a perfectionist, I’d say there’s a good chance you are. Or at least have perfectionist tendencies. I know I do. After all, who doesn’t want to be perfect? Who doesn’t want to be the one who gets the gold stars, the big wins, and the admiration?
Perfectionism is one of those traits people typically see as a positive, but underneath it is often self-defeating thoughts and emotions, low self-esteem, stress, and chronic anxiety, which actually make it harder to achieve your goals. And, if I’m being honest here, it makes it harder to function in general.
As a health coach, I see this all the time, and I know what it feels like. The procrastination, the all-or-nothing thinking, the unrealistic standards. My clients get so wrapped up in trying to “get it right,” that it defeats the whole purpose of working with someone to get their health on track in the first place.
What is Perfectionism Anyway?
Psychologists describe perfectionism as the tendency to demand an extremely high or even flawless level of performance (from yourself or others) — significantly more than what’s required from the situation. It’s the unhealthy belief that anything less than perfect is unacceptable. No pressure, right?
It’s a combo of excessively high personal standards and overly critical self-evaluations. And it sets you up for feeling shame, judgement, and blame, which then leads to more of those debilitating, self-defeating thoughts.
Being motivated is great. But there’s a big difference between healthy motivation and aiming for perfection. Healthy motivation looks like self-focus, self-compassion, and having a growth mindset, while perfection is more about people-pleasing, fear, and control.
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